Sometimes the best we can do is just try

Sometimes the best we can do is just try.

Perhaps not everyone has one of these people in their lives, but I’d like to think we aren’t alone. Here goes, admission time, we have a crabby neighbor. We have since we moved in. Within the first year of being here we had a surprise birthday party for my mother in law and had people park off our culdesac so she wouldn’t expect anything was up. We had probably 20 friends of hers over – I think it was her 40th bday party (can’t remember) – so there were a bunch of cars. 

After our surprise party a couple of our guests went out to their cars that had handwritten notes on them complaining about parking in front of their house. “Next time you visit someone you should park in front of their house not ours”… Hand laminated with tape since it was rainy out, and put square in the middle of their door window. 

Needless to say we’ve tried to be overly nice as much as possible. Offering fresh organic tomatoes from our garden, cookies, trying to have pleasant conversations… It just turns out the 60+ retired grandma lady just happens to have a crabby son who lives with her and is, well, crabby. 

Like I said we try and do little things to make them like us. Last year I brought over tomatoes and peppers and the grandma lady was happy and commented how great they tasted for breakfast. Then when I saw the son (without her there) he complained that I needed to stop offering my tomatoes and peppers since they were too spicy and she can only have organic… Door closed… Oh, did I forget or just not get a chance to mention they were organic?

Today – new spring – new year – I see that the grown adult son’s car is gone. Perfect.
Sometimes the best we can do is just try. My wife and little girls had made oatmeal cookies this morning with white chocolate that were amazing. I wanted to thank her for the firewood they had offered on the street for free. We like to have fires, so we’ve gotten a ton of wood as they have decided to cut down all of their mature 40+ year old cotton woods. Don’t ask me why… Point is we are thankful for the wood.

Again, check the son isn’t there, perfect! I pack up 5 cookies on a cute party plate and a photo of our new baby on my phone, and depart to say thank you and share a photo of our new baby. Two things a grandma can’t resist right?

– she’s diabetic so she can’t have sweets
– son isn’t a sweet tooth so he wouldn’t eat them
– cute photo but how many kids do you want?
– you have to be able to support them right?


OK so last effort to kill her with kindness- offer her organic tomato and pepper seedlings for her garden.

– my son has a really specific type of tomato since he likes it on his burgers, so he wouldn’t want yours.

What do I do then?

Wish her well and head on over to our other neighbor that’s super crazy nice. She’s and her son (she’s in 50’s/ he 30’s?) Immigrated from Ukraine and they support their family back home. We talk whenever we see each other outside and he is often outside in the garage with a project or lathing some wood in his little shop. They weren’t home, but I left the plate (covered in plastic) in their table by the front door.

Sometimes the best we can do is just try.
Is there anyone that you have been trying to kill with kindness? Is there any rut you feel stuck in no matter how hard or long you try? Leave a comment below – I’d love to hear it and see if I can help 🙂